Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Kids’ Shows That Don’t Suck: Vol 2

This is sort of cheating a little bit, but the fact is that the first list of kids’ shows that I like to watch with my kid is the most popular blog post I’ve ever written.  And since it’s been almost a year, we watch a lot of different shows now, some of them brand new.  Sure, we'll always watch Spongebob and The Clone Wars, but there are so many new things to try that we're both growing in to.

Chime in if I’ve missed one that is awesome.  Or if you prefer, decry my selections as offensive or ridiculous.  I’m open to interpretations other than mine...even if they're wrong.


I suspect this Disney product was created for adults, and kids just happened to glom on to it.  The title characters are two suburban boy geniuses who pass the time by inventing amazing devices, and trying to avoid being “busted” by their shrewish teenage sister.  This, while interesting at times, fades to the background when we get into the show's subplot, the super-spy adventures of their pet platypus Perry.

Feathered, not furred.

Perry the Platypus could be the next great animated superstar.  Who knows, he may already be.  Case in point, months ago, I was shopping for kid pajamas with the boy (for the boy, you weirdos), and we saw the character on a shirt.  On first glance, it appeared to be one of the Angry Birds, and I said so.  I was told slowly, with clear annunciation as if to a slower person that you don’t wish to offend,  “No Dad, that’s Perry.”  Perry lives a secret life as Agent P, the arch nemesis of the...evil?...and brilliant Dr. Doofenshmirtz, whose dastardly machines are forever threatening the boring existence of the suburban summer.  Yes it sounds dumb, but it's so not.


Come on, children of the 80’s.  You remember the Thundercats.  I fondly remember running around a playground screaming “Ho-ooooh!” at the top of my lungs (an activity that would get you into a significant amount of trouble today.  Especially at my age).  We’ve recently rewatched the first season of the classic series, and while the boy really loves them, I’ve discovered that I can’t abide watching it.  Whether it’s the indifferent (at best) hand-drawn animation, or the fact that Lion-O has a serious case of Inner Monologue Deficiency, or IMD (“My hand…it’s…burning!”), watching the show now is an exercise in flagellating yourself for being such an idiot at 6 years old. 
The new Thundercats on Cartoon Network seeks to modernize the classic series by taking it to a darker, somewhat more sophisticated setting.  The one-hour pilot, which aired in July 2011, was a legitimately great piece of television.  A compelling overarching storyline, characters that have a little depth—though most are still pretty one-note at this point, it is a kids’ show after all—and very good but subtle anime touches make it appointment TV in our house.  And the new Snarf sort of reminds me of my cat, Max.

The resemblance is passing, sure, but it should be noted that the photo on the right was not posed in any way.



We watch a lot of PBS in our house, especially in that 5-7 PM kid-heavy block, because the guilt modern parents feel for letting their kids watch too much television is alleviated somewhat when the shows are deemed “educational.”  The newest incarnation of Dr. Seuss’ Cat in the Hat is a great example of a show that is fun and engaging to watch, while still providing lessons that stick.  To say the chief character is “beloved” is to dance with cliché, and the new version, voiced by an ever youthful-sounding Martin Short, seems to embrace the character while winking at the absurdness of it all.  Mike Myers’ attempt at this in the retched live-action movie was...rather less successful.

Gah!
The animation in the PBS version is a delightfully low-tech play on the familiar illustration style of the books, and the dialogue isn't stilted or oversimplified, tactics that tend to bore parents and insult smarter kids.  The lessons lean toward science and nature topics, but a great deal of time is spent in teaching social interaction and the art of being curious about stuff.  Also, there are lots of ludicrous made-up words that nonetheless are applicable to daily life.

"To the Thingamajigger!"
Dinosaur Train

Dinosaur Train would seem to be based on the decision that resulted from a Friday afternoon brainstorming session.
Boss-like Figure:  “Okay, we need a show to pitch to the network Monday morning, so let’s get thinking.  Edwards, what do kids like?”
Edwards, startled:  “Uh…like, dinosaurs?”
BLF:  “Great!  Hanrahan, what else?”
Hanrahan, visibly irritated:  “I don’t know…trains?”  <sullenly checks Red Sox score>
BLF:  “Super!  Throw some time-travel in there and we’ve got a show!  Get some concept art and story boards together over the weekend.  I’m heading to the Hamptons!”


Ta-Da!

And so we have another entry in the PBS block.  The show is actually very straightforward about teaching basic paleontology and exploration of known dinosaur species, and this works beautifully because startled Edwards was right…kids have loved dinosaurs unconditionally for as long as the word has existed.  But blended deftly into the stories are great teaching moments about acceptance of those who are different—one of the chief characters is a T-Rex adopted into a pteranodon family—and the scientific method of deducing facts through observation.  The time traveling train is simply a plot device to allow them to see the entire Mezozoic Era--so the juxtaposition isn't stupid at all! 

The one thing the show really skirts around though is where meat eating dinosaurs, um, acquire the meat.


"He's gonna eat the Goldblum?"
 
Veggie Tales


Yes, the show has a specific religious message, so take that any way you'd like.  While the older episodes were more overtly Christian in their delivery, the more recent feature-length films feel much more secular in the story-telling, saving the evangelizing for the end (so you can skip it if you want). 

The best features are the parodies of existing blockbuster films.  "The Lord of the Beans," "Sheerluck Holmes," and "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything" are among our favorites.  The saccharine sweet wholesomeness of the stories and lessons are cut nicely by a very acidic knowledge of pop culture and the absurdities sometimes found there, with a nice bitter aftertaste provided by the curmudgeonly Pa Grape.


I suppose you're right, Y-U guy, I suppose you're right.  But it still works.

Enjoy TV with your kids, everybody!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

What I Did on My Extended Summer Vacation (from writing)

Hi, I'm Jon.  You may remember me from such blogs as, well, this one, and some of you from real life.  It's probably a faint memory at this point, since I haven't posted since April. 

Why the long absence?  I'm not sure I can pin it to any one thing, although I don't think it's a coincidence that I started reading George R. R. Martin's "A Game of Thrones" about a week after my last post.  I'm not blaming him, but it's not the sort of book you put down once you start.  And once I was finished with it (in record time for me), there were three more, right there.  I got to the end of book 4 just as the long-awaited book 5 was released, one thing led to another, and 4,800 pages later here I am. Don't worry, I'm not going to review the thing.  There have been probably as many words written about the saga as are actually in it, and it seems unlikely that I'd be able to add any thoughts that could be considered "new."  But getting back on point, George R. R. Martin is personally to blame for the lapse.

That's not entirely true. I have lots of other things going on--heavier responsibilities at the paying job, coaching little league and various other dad stuff, traveling--but it's not like that's a new development. The truth is that writing anything for the last 6 months has felt like way more of a chore than it should be.    I love doing this, but for some reason it just seemed like a big weight to lift.  And the longer I let it sit there, the heavier the weight got, much like cleaning the garage.  That's the big reason I'm back here now--I realized that I'd started equating writing with menial household labor.  This cannot stand.

So I'm back.  I even have some things that can roll out immediately that have been hanging around for 6 months (man, I couldn't even post stuff I'd already written).  Keep an eye on this space.  Send me encouragement.  Send me ideas for articles.  I have some--I'll take more.

-Jon

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Tom Hanks IS Michael Caine...

The best five minutes of the Elton John episode of SNL, and it has nothing to do with Elton John.  Stay with it through the ad...Hulu is much more reliable about these things than YouTube.

Revel in the glory of make-believe Michael Caine's contempt for make-believe Ringo Starr.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Always Take Kids Seriously...

I love Letters of Note.  Every time I read one of the little pieces of verbal history on their site, there's the possibility that I will be awed, or simply start blubbering to myself.

This one is from a kid in the UK in 1973 who was asking some advice from his favorite TV show characters.  I've never seen "Blue Peter" but I gather it's something on the order of Sesame Street here in the States.  This is a great example of adults taking what a kid is saying at face value, and supporting him rather than giving him a chuckling pat on the head.  In the words of the letter-writer himself, if the response he got "had shown any hint of ridicule or disbelief I might perhaps never have trained to become a medical scientist or been driven to achieve the impossible dream, and really make a difference to a human being's life. I remember being thrilled at the time to have been taken seriously. Actually, even nowadays I am thrilled when people take my ideas seriously."

Take a minute and read the link below.  It'll brighten your day.  And maybe make you listen more closely to what your kids are saying.

 http://www.lettersofnote.com/2011/03/i-think-i-no-how-to-make-people-or.html

Sunday, March 27, 2011

In 30 Minutes or Less!


Sure, anyone could cook their family in 30 minutes if they had a whole production staff prepping everything for them...

Sunday, March 20, 2011

You Need the Basic Instructions

Basic Instructions is perhaps my favorite web comic going right now.  Scott Meyer, the creator, seems like a kindred spirit...in that he overanalyzes every social situation and bit of pop culture he comes across.  He then converts it to a short life-lesson, complete with helpful role-playing examples.

It's always helpfully linked in my blog roll to the right, but here is one of my favorites to give you an idea of what we're dealing with here.

Monday, March 14, 2011

On Brendan Fraser...

I'm here to eulogize a friend...or at least the career of someone a lot of us once thought of as a friend.  It is necessitated by the news that Brendan Fraser's next film will be something entitled Whole Lotta Sole.  It's a fish heist story.  Yes, that kind of sole.

Honestly, this would have been better.

What an odyssey Brendan Fraser's career has been.  Encino Man introduced us to this endearing lunk of a man.  True, most film fans likely dismissed him based on that credit only, what with his most compelling line of dialogue being "Betty...nugs." 

Pauly Shore was the draw for this movie.  It was a different time...
Then he starting showing up in dramatic roles...and killing them.  From his turn as a secretly Jewish football star in WASP-dominated 1950's prep school in School Ties, and then as a driven Harvard political science major who learns practical knowledge from a homeless Joe Pesci in With Honors, it appeared that he could be the next great American leading man.  A sort of GenX Harrison Ford, or more appropriately maybe Michael Keaton, with his goofy comedic properties.  Tall, handsome, funny, and as proven by 1999's surprise hit The Mummy, a truly rough and ready action star as well.  Sure, there was George of the Jungle, and Blast From the Past, but he certainly wasn't the weak link in those productions, either in concept or execution.  And he did make Airheads, a cult favorite among my people (Midwestern air guitar players), so the 90's were, on the whole, a great decade for Fraser.

But the karmic wheel spins, and Fraser's slow downswing began almost immediately after The Mummy.  His very next movie was Dudley Do-Right.  Honestly, who remembers the cartoon Dudley Do-Right?  Anyone?  The answer is no, because it bombed at the box office ($70M budget, $9.6M gross), and the descent began.  Monkeybone, two disappointing Mummy sequels, the sometimes-great-but-mostly-not Bedazzled, all adding to the dismal tally.  A smallish role in the overwrought 2004 Best Picture Crash marks the last respectable film role for our hero.  I give you his last 5 films, in order of oldest to newest:

-Journey To The Center Of The Earth (In "comin' atcha" 3D!)
-The Mummy:  Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (Hey, did you know there are Chinese mummies too?  Yeah, Rachel Weisz didn't care, either.)
-Inkheart (Anybody out there see this?  Again, the answer is no.)
-Extraordinary Measures (Really a Harrison Ford movie, and it bombed too)
-Furry Vengeance  (92 minutes of our boy being kicked in the nuts by CGI raccoons)

I didn't include his uncredited appearance in G.I. Joe, though I will mention it to save some of his dignity.

Buuuuuuut, then his delicately-waisted action figure steals it right away again.
 It's like he's become drawn to ridiculously bad ideas, put together by morons.  So the fish burglary movie shouldn't be a shock to anyone, but it is a sad nadir to a long-fading career that started with such promise. 

Rest in peace, Link.  We'll always have Encino.